“I begin this chapter with a song, sung by Frank Sinatra entitled, “That’s Life”. Although, it may not have the same meaning in lyrics, it is another expression of what Life Means to me”.
There are times in your life that seem like nothing more than perfect days and wonderful nights, warm summers, and cool winters, and star lit skies. I discovered that most of my life felt this way and enjoyed everything life had to offer. I realized young in life that the way I was brought up, the values that were instilled in me from my parents, my grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins that I was a very fortunate person. It was not that life had riches, or pots of gold at the end of rainbows, but that life was as it should be: full of wonder, happiness, and challenges, but not without disappointments and sorrow. I felt this belief most my life all through my teenage years, my working years, my marriage, raising our beautiful daughter, Gina, and wonderful son, Dennis, and my wife Carol. I realized that wonder, love, and fulfillment were not gone, but highly enriched when they came along. I have given credit to those mentioned in my life over and over again, as they were the seas of a higher level. I give credit to where it all began and that is with God! Even though I never attended church on a regular basis, I as a person gave credit in my prayers and gave thanks many times weekly to God and Jesus, not only for what they have done, but for who was around me. I knew I had a fortunate life and realized (at a young age) that this type of life was not always the norm.
My heart has always gone out to a wonderful loving Mom, a loving and guiding Dad, and two of the most adoring brothers you could have. At times, I forgot how fortunate I was and there were many times I even forgot to pray, but God continued his love and his lessons in life.
As time went on, there were many challenges in life, marriage, raising children, and seeing them growing up. Work to me was always easy; I love challenges and exploring opportunities, should it be working in a grocery store, department store, meat market, creating my own business or even buying, renting, and selling real estate. With the help and understanding of Carol things worked out as we learned more about life, raising children, and grandchildren. She became as important to me as my mother in my earlier years and became a wonderful mother and later a terrific grandmother! Later on, there came the challenges of learning a new skill such as computers, networking, and other skills that went with it. As challenging and exciting as my life was,
God (in his greatness) has worked his miracles and Gina has found how wonderful life can be by loving your God and loving your children. She too has been blessed with the knowledge that without God how difficult life can be.
I went many years putting life first and God somewhere behind. I thought many of the things I did in life were for the children and I felt life would be grand. I felt that if I was there “model,” that they would follow my examples, by doing the right things; as I knew them and showing them that by hard work all was possible. Yet, they seem to have found the elements I have felt in my life and somehow incorporated them into theirs but, in better ways.
My prayers went like this as a child, “God, thank you for my Mom, my Dad, my brothers, my grandparents, my aunts, uncles, and cousins. Thank you, God, for the home you have provided, the food on our table, and for the life you have given.”
It was a simple prayer, but it was important to me to give thanks for what was given to me.
As we had children, my prayers included my wife, our daughter, and son. The message was the same and I will always be thankful for what God has given.
Life goes by so very fast! If I did not mention it in other chapters, I would like to mention how many times I would hear my Mom say to people how fast her children were growing and how she wished she could keep them the same age or even slow down the process. I too mentioned this many times in life! My childhood is gone as well as our children’s, but now we have the childhood dreams for our grandchildren. As we look back, they are growing and it is as though the years become days and the days become seconds.
Life means to me that you give back those moments to those around you. In my lifetime, I feel that I have done much of this in many ways; some are understood and some will probably go by and never be noticed. But in life, you give love and hope to be taken and enjoyed. I am sure I took love for granted many times and never realized it. I somehow knew I was wrong due to the actions of those around me, but there were times I just let it go without realizing it. I now know that the cycle continues. All through my life I always knew that I would never set the world on fire, but I had principles of hard work, honestly, and love. I also knew that sometimes I came off looking like just the opposite, but in my mind I knew I felt I was doing what was right.
If only I could express verbally what was in my mind and heart, it would have felt so good. So I compromised by trying to express it in actions, which were at times very confusing. I would go over what I wanted in my mind, but had the worst time communicating it. As time passed, I would eventually be able to say it, but many times it was too late! I am so fortunate in having two children that have a better capacity to say and do what they feel and want. They have become their own people and I admire them for this. They have found new ways to life and; although, I have trouble understanding, I know they are happy and they are making their own memories and creating new families and traditions.
I will never be able to say exactly how I feel in my heart, but let me say now plainly and simply what I hope will never be misinterpreted.
Life is a beautiful thing, we can be blessed with the most wonderful family from the time we are born, to the time we give birth to our own, but unless you tell the ones around you and thank God, time will move on. So I say to you, love each other, pray, talk to God and enjoy what life has to offer! Take the bad times and use them as experiences to make the good times better, work hard, trust in yourself, make your faith known to God (not only in prayers, but in His presence), teach what you have learned to others, understand that not everyone will be like you, make adjustments for those that may scorn you, and forgive them. Always follow your heart and live for others and yourself!
Without loving yourself (as selfish as that sounds), you will not be able to love others as you should. Divide your time, work hard, play hard, give to others, and learn what others have to offer. In life, your family gives you the foundation needed to start your life, but look upon others for examples, and trust that God is there to guide you, and realize there are Angels that will come in and out of your life. They will not be recognizable to you at the time, but your heart will sense them, and they will guide you with just a few words or even by just showing up when needed. Like a good GPS turn him on and use him not only during the bad times, but the good time as well. God is there for you not as a crutch, but as goodwill, love, peace, happiness, and guidance. (Embrace it as there will never be another)!
There are so many inspirations and quotes in life. One of my favorites comes from my mom who said, “Take care of your pennies and your dollars will take care of you.” As solid as that is and how much I have lived by it, there is another one that just makes good sense to me and something I hold dear;
“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass; it’s about learning to dance in the rain.”
Vivian Greene
Another quote from my Mom is:
“After the rain, the sun always shines.”
Matilda Mistretta Stafford
Another quote that I feel is more in tune to our son and daughter Dennis and Gina goes like this:
“Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.”
I hold that saying so true, the fact is that it is so powerful to me and how positive and straight forward it is.
Stay with those thoughts that are warm, strong, and guiding! Danny